Where Are You?

With today's technology, how difficult is it to find someone?

Very.  If he chooses not to leave a digital trail.

I must be getting old.  Few nights ago, the ghost of Christmas past visited my dreams.  I dreamt of all my past relationships, my disappointments, heartaches and tears and those I caused.

My conscience pricked me.

People move on and memories fade away.  Still, I would like to make my amends, say my apologies and make peace before everything flies away.

我已经不记得

我已经不记得他的好
我也不记得曾经爱他哪一点
日子久了
有些事已渐渐地模糊

我不记得了
这毕竟是件好事
若是不记得那些伤心的事
那更好

结婚

December is an emotional month.  I couldn't help but think of what happened this time last year.  I was in India and everything felt wrong.  In the worst possible way, the relationship ended a couple of weeks later.

今天他说他要结婚了。

I congratulated him but I thought "Was I that forgettable?"  That hurts my ego.

The Odd One (Out)

I can't describe nor put a finger to how I feel these days.

I feel bored. frustrated. restless. aimless. lost.

Maybe I just need a holiday.  Is that the solution? Or am beginning to feel trapped and losing sight of what I am doing?  I have seen this before.  It's just that the cycle is getting shorter.

I don't feel belonged.

And I don't know what else I should do.