Shadows

There are shadows even in the night.

There are times when I thought I have finally shaken them off, only to see them again lurking in the corner, waiting to haunt my memories.

I wish I can forget.

Forget how vulnerable I used to feel, forget how angry I could get, forget how hurtful I could become.

Perhaps they served as a reminder to the consequences when I allowed myself to fall into despair and stop believing. I would be lying if I were to say that I am not afraid. I am. There are no certainties in my future and I wonder where all these free-spiritedness is going to lead me.

Am I on the extreme end of the pendulum? Or am I finally at my equilibrium?

Will I finally be at peace and learn to live with my mistakes and past?

Will I eventually learn to forgive myself?