Man or Woman

Someone I met recently inspired me to have a heading like this but I have absolutely no idea what I should write about without hurting the innocent. I guess I will start with a question. If a woman loves only woman and she is called a lesbian, why is it that normally she will be with a woman who dressed so much like a man?

If a woman dresses as a man and behaves like a man, doesn't it mean that she THINKS that she's a man... and therefore it is only naturally that she (he) loves women? Whereas a woman who thinks that she's a woman, behaves as a woman, loves people who dresses like men and behave like men, doesn't that mean that she loves men? and hence she is not a lesbian?

I am not getting it... and probably getting more muddled by the minute... should get my sleep soon.